Covered recognizes that trafficking can start with just a simple online conversation.

Below are some yellow and red flags and some tips to keep an eye out for in order to protect yourself and others.

KEEP KIDS SAFE FROM GROOMING 

What is grooming?

Grooming is when someone builds a relationship with a child in order to sexually abuse or exploit them. This abuse can happen in a physical meeting, but it increasingly happens online when children or young people are tricked or persuaded into sexual activity on webcams or into sending sexual images.

55% of young people have communicated with someone they first met online.

How does online grooming happen?:

Grooming involves building a relationship with a child in order to later abuse or exploit them.

Groomers can use sophisticated strategies to gain your child’s trust online: 

• They frequent sites that children use, sometimes pretending to be young people themselves to trick children into chatting and sharing. 

• They may be adults. They may also be under 18 themselves and groom a younger child, or they could be another young person that is coerced into obtaining sexual images of other children.

• They use personal information they have gathered about a child to develop a connection with them and as the relationship grows, the child becomes comfortable sharing more information about themselves. 

• They build secrecy in the relationship and aim to physically and emotionally separate a child from their family and friends. 

• They test and gauge how willing a child is to engage in sexual activities. Some young people may use the internet to explore their sexuality and initially welcome and be open to online contact that facilitates this.

• They share sexually explicit material and may ask for an intimate image of the child. This can then be used as a tool to pressure the child to send more material, or to meet in person. 

The risk of online grooming increases if your child does any of these things: 

• Posts personal details like their full name or school online without using the privacy controls — this means the information is accessible to people who could use it to build an inappropriate relationship with your child.

• Accepts contacts or ‘friend’ requests from people they do not know — this allows strangers to access their personal information and images.

• Responds to anonymous users on apps and websites.

• Visits sites targeting adults, such as some social media dating, online chat, or gaming sites — this increases the likelihood of your child being contacted by older teens or adults for sexual purposes.

• Posts ‘sexy’ photos and messages or uses a sexually suggestive screen name — children may see this as being mature or funny, but it might attract dangerous people.

How can I protect my child?:

Stay involved in your child’s digital world.

• Keep up to date with the sites, apps and online chat services they are using, and explore them together. 

• Consider whether you are comfortable with the content on these sites and the potential for contact with others, including adults.

• If you are concerned, they are visiting sites they have not told you about, talk to them about your concern. As a backup, you could look at your child’s internet browsing history — but this should be a last resort. The aim is to establish trust and open dialogue.

• Try to be aware of who they socialize with in the real world and who they know only in the virtual world. 

Build an open trusting relationship.

• Keep communication open and calm so they know they can come to you when someone is asking them to do something that does not feel right.

• They especially need to feel comfortable about telling you if they have done something they regret, and someone is pressuring them as a result.

Help your child to protect their privacy.

• Guide your child to use their privacy settings on the sites they use and restrict their online information to known friends only.

• Encourage them to use a first name or nickname to identify themselves in online chats and social media, or when they are gaming. They should never disclose their phone number, address, or school.

• Explain that they should not send photographs of themselves that clearly show their identity. 

• For younger children, ask them not to post or text images or videos without your permission.

Teach your child to be alert to signs of inappropriate contact.

• Help your child recognize signs that an ‘online friend’ may be trying to develop an inappropriate relationship, even if they initially welcomed the contact. See warning signs for your child below.

• Young people may be particularly vulnerable if they are starting to explore their sexuality through their online activities. Check out these advice articles for parents about online pornography and the hard-to-have conversations. 

Warning signs for your child:

Encourage your child to be wary when someone:    

• asks a lot of questions about personal information soon after meeting.

• starts asking them for favors and does things in return — abusers often use promises, gifts, and favors to gain trust.

• wants to keep the relationship secret — online groomers typically try to keep their relationships with their targets extremely private from the beginning, asking for it to be something ‘special’ just between the two people.

• contacts them frequently and in different ways, like texting, through Instagram or online chat services.

• asks them things like who else uses their device or computer, or which room they use it in

• compliments them on their appearance or body or asks things like, ‘have you ever been kissed’?

• insists on meeting — tries to make them feel guilty or even threatens them if they are unwilling.

Many of these warning signs can apply to people the child knows in person, as well as to strangers. If your child starts to become uncomfortable about the relationship, they should report inappropriate contact to the site or service used to contact them.

Establish safety guidelines for meeting online ‘friends’ face-to-face.

• Explain that it is safest to keep online ‘friends’ online. If your child does want to meet someone face-to-face, they should get your permission first — to make sure they're safe.

• Explain that it's safest to meet in a public place during the day, and they should be accompanied by you or another trusted adult. 

• Remind them to tell someone where they are going and who they are meeting.

What to do if something goes wrong:

Your child may not tell you if an online ‘friendship’ has become compromising or difficult because they are embarrassed or ashamed, or afraid it might make things worse. This is what online groomers rely on. Your child may also have welcomed the initial contact until it made them feel uncomfortable.

Be alert to worrying changes in your child's behavior or mood. Watch for signs of withdrawal, anxiety, sadness or changed interactions with family or friends.

If your child has provided a photo or given information to someone that they are concerned about, or if they are being pressured to do so, there are things you can do. 

Stay calm and reassure your child they are not in trouble.

• Explain that even adults get tricked into doing things they regret.

• Talk to them without being judgmental or angry and make them feel like they can come to you about anything, without fear of being punished or criticized.

• Do not cut off your child's internet access, as they may see this as punishment and not open up to you in future.

Report and Block 

• Call 911 if their physical safety is at risk.

• Contact your local law enforcement agency or your local FBI field office (contact information can be found at https://www.fbi.gov/contact-us/field-offices

• File a complaint online with the FBI's Internet Crime Complaint Center at www.IC3.gov